Too Many Lessons for Me



Did you ever have one of those weeks?  Nothing  bad happened.  Actually, in that regard, it was a good week.  But you keep getting the same message given to you over and over again.  Earlier this week I wrote about catching myself being less than I am.  It's not a pretty picture when you find yourself behaving in these very unbecoming ways.  You apologize to all involved.  You humble yourself to your friends in the hope that they will help keep you on the right path.  You think you're ready to move on and try again.  But everyday, in as many ways as possible, you are reminded again and again and again of what you did and may well be still doing. 

All week I have caught myself being critical and judgmental of another, and then doing exactly the same thing.  I shouldn't expect a co-worker to stop and visit with me after being gone a few days, if I don't stop what I'm doing and welcome him back.  I left work thinking critically of my friend and ready to be angry with him for his what he hadn't done when here I was doing the very thing I was criticizing him for.  In my short ride home, I became aware that I was pointing the finger at him when I should have been pointing at myself.

OK.  So I started the week with a lesson on my behavior and I ended it with the very same thing.  Each day, as I spent my time studying and in quiet, this message was given to me.   What are YOU doing that is better? 

And the answer, obviously, was nothing.  I was so ready to point the finger in his direction but I wasn't even looking at myself.  Oh, I thought I was.  I believed myself to be 'better' than him in these ways. But, as so often happens, God put a mirror in my every path and showed me that I had better 'take the log out of my own eye' before I throw sticks at someone else.

Wow!  What a week!  I've learned a lot and instead of feeling bad, I really feel so much better.  You see, I can't do anything about my friend and his behavior.  There is nothing I can do to remedy that situation, but there is a lot that I can do about my own.  In a time in my life when there are some big issues in which I have no control, THIS I can control.  THIS I can do something about.

And, who knows?  If I change my behaviors, if I change me, others around me just might change too.  Anyway, it's a start.  And I choose to do so, right now.